I’d
love to have job where I can earn a fortune on the side
Being
a MP is a cushy number, I might give that a try
I’d
sit on the green benches and shout “Hear, hear” every now and then
Whilst
thinking about, how not to get caught out, by The Telegraph ever again.
I
can claim a ransom monthly for a swanky London
The
fact that I don’t need it, doesn’t make me sad
Four
bedrooms, two bathrooms and a jacuzzi in which to chill
I
can live with my relly’s, if I buy ’em a new telly and you can pick up the bill
I
get my travel paid for, my meals and laundry too
I
can’t possibly travel economy, first class is all I do
The
plastic seat on my toilet has been changed to cushioned leather
My
hollowfibre quilt, had started to wilt, but has been re-stuffed with phoenix
feathers
Sixty
five grand a year is not a lot of money
I
need the extra bunces, I do, it isn’t funny
I’ve
used the Common’s Foodbank and yesterday had to wait
They’d
run out of pheasant, it was very unpleasant, I had to make do with Skate
Can
you imagine having to survive on such a paltry wage?
You
look at me horrified as if I have the plague
Pulling
in four grand a month is really not that much
I
have school fees to pay, my horses need hay – I’m definitely not out of touch
Austerity
is a problem for me as well you know?
My
maid buys the shopping from Sainsbury’s now, never from Waitrose
We
ate organic four times last week and rarely drink champagne
Well,
I say hardly ever, a Nebuchadnezzar, thrice weekly keeps me sane
But
I’m going through the wringer unselfishly you see
To
give you a voice in Parliament, a noble calling you’d agree
We
are all in it together, so will you get a grip
So
remember my sacrifice as you seal, the envelope of your Disability appeal, which
will be decimated under PIP.
